Time is slipping away....

Well here it is another birthday-another year gone... I wish I knew where the last decade went really?! It is really weird for me to think that I am now 34 yrs old...another six years and I will be 40, how can that be possible? I so do not feel that old and I don't look it so I guess that is good, age is just a number I know but its hard to tell that to my heart sometimes. I think the part that really gets to me sometimes is that I want to be a mother so bad...I want to have a child of my own and to give my parents the chance to be Grandparents more than anything! I just feel like time is running out and I have not accomplished a whole lot in those 34 years, I mean what difference have I made really? Birthday's are weird for me now and have been for the last couple of years...it seems like I'm an up and down basket case riding on an emotional roller coaster the whole month before stressing about the day when I should be looking forward to it, looking forward to celebrating with my family and friends. I do have to say though that when I do have these sad moments of feeling old and worthless cause I am still single there is nothing better then to read Sister Oaks' book: A Single Voice. I have read that book twice now and highlighted the thing to death... she is such a wonderful lady and her words bring such comfort to my aching heart sometimes! I always seem to turn to just the right pages to read the parts I need to at the time which I know is a blessing... this is what I just read earlier when I was having one of my break down moments: "Time is a precious commodity. Make your moments count, first, by making an effort to stay close to the Spirit so you can function at your best; second, by planning and setting goals for a more balanced life; third, by cultivating an eternal perspective; and fourth, by spending time with family and friends. When the winds of loneliness are whistling around us and we feel assailed by life, may we remember the Savior. There exists in all of us the ability to persist with patience one day at a time. When the clock is ticking and the tempest is raging, consider it an opportunity to rise up with all the beauty and strength and wisdom within you to become the woman the Lord wants you to become." So yes time is slipping away but I just have to remember its going to be okay... married or not I'm going to be okay!